How Couples Can Thrive Financially After Military Service
Sep 17, 2025
Ms. Veteran Affairs Shares How Couples Can Thrive Financially After Service
It was one of those late evenings when I received the call. The kind of call that pulls at your heartstrings because you can hear the uncertainty in the voice on the other end. Maria, a military spouse, was at her wit’s end. Her husband, Alex, had just transitioned out of the military, and although they had hoped for a smooth adjustment, the financial strain was already taking a toll.
I could tell from the get-go that Maria was overwhelmed, unsure of where to begin or how to turn things around. That’s when I knew I had to step in and guide her through this—because I’ve been there, and I’ve seen countless others who’ve walked the same tough path.
“I just don’t know what to do anymore,” she said, her voice trembling. “We’ve been married for years, but this whole civilian life thing is harder than we thought. We’ve got bills piling up, and Alex is struggling to find steady work. How do we make it through?”
Starting with the Basics: Understanding Where You Stand
“Maria, take a deep breath. We’re going to work through this one step at a time,” I reassured her. “First things first, let’s get clear on where you both stand financially. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed when you don’t have a clear picture of what’s going on. We need to lay everything out—income, expenses, debts—everything. Are you with me?”
She hesitated for a moment, but then I could hear the relief in her voice when she said, “Yes, I’m ready. What do we do?”
Creating a Plan Together
When you’re transitioning from the military, you’re often used to having your finances dictated by a regular paycheck, set allowances, and the occasional deployment bump. But civilian life doesn’t always work that way. And that’s okay—it’s all about adjusting, planning, and coming together as a couple to take control of your financial future.
“Start by writing down all your sources of income. This includes Alex’s current job and any other side gigs or veteran benefits he might be eligible for. Next, list all of your fixed expenses—things like rent, utilities, car payments, and any debt,” I advised. “This will give you a sense of what’s essential, and where you might need to adjust.”
We worked together to create a budget that was realistic, taking into account the changes they were facing. The key, I told Maria, was to focus on the essentials first and find ways to cut back on the non-essentials.
The Financial Checklist to Kickstart Your Plan
Here’s what Maria and Alex worked through together, and what you can do too:
- Income & Expenses: List all sources of income and categorize your fixed expenses. Be honest about what you can afford.
- Prioritize Bills: Pay your most critical bills first—housing, utilities, food. Everything else can be adjusted or delayed if needed.
- Track Spending: Create a habit of tracking daily spending. Use apps or spreadsheets to get a full picture of where your money is going.
- Build an Emergency Fund: Start saving—even a small amount—toward an emergency fund to cushion you during tough times.
Tapping into Veteran-Specific Resources
I also reminded Maria that as a military spouse, she had access to a wealth of resources that could help bridge the financial gap while they figured things out. Many veteran programs are specifically designed to assist both veterans and their families during this transition.
“You’ve got to take full advantage of the benefits Alex earned during his service,” I told her. “For example, VA Disability Compensation might be something Alex qualifies for if he has any service-related health issues. If he hasn’t looked into it yet, it could provide a critical financial cushion.”
I also pointed out programs like the Transition Assistance Program (TAP) and various career counseling services to help Alex find work that aligns with his skills and experience. Finally, I mentioned survivor benefits in case something unexpected happened, reminding Maria that it’s better to know what’s available than to be caught unprepared.
The Power of Communication
As we spoke more, I made sure to remind Maria that one of the most important things they could do—financially and emotionally—was communicate. “It’s easy to feel like you’re both on separate islands during this time, but you’re in this together. Talk openly about your worries, your goals, and what’s important to both of you. This will keep you united when everything else feels uncertain.”
“Thanks, Ms. Veteran Affairs,” Maria said with a sigh of relief. “It’s been hard, but I feel like we have a path now. I’m starting to see a way forward.”
Tips for Financial Success After Military Service
- Talk Openly: Don’t let financial stress build up without talking it through. If you’re not on the same page, it’s easy for things to spiral.
- Utilize Veteran Benefits: Look into VA benefits, TAP programs, and job search assistance to help with the transition.
- Set Financial Goals Together: Don’t just talk about the financial problems—set goals for the future, even if it’s something small like building an emergency fund.
- Be Adaptable: Be open to adjusting your plan as you go. Life after the military is full of changes, and that’s okay—it’s about rolling with it together.
- Build Community: Seek out support from other military families or veteran-focused organizations. Having a community to lean on makes a world of difference.
A New Beginning
Over the next few months, Maria and Alex found their footing. Their budget was more manageable, Alex began applying for jobs using the resources I recommended, and they felt like they were on the path to a more secure financial future.
“We’re doing it, Maria. We’re really doing it,” Alex said one night, as they sat down to dinner after their budgeting session.
Maria smiled. “We couldn’t have done it without your help, Ms. Veteran Affairs.”
And that’s why I’m here. To make sure no family has to face the challenges of transitioning alone. Together, we can make it through to the other side, stronger than before.
Ms. Veteran Affairs’ Financial Transition Checklist for Couples
- Get clear on your income and expenses.
- Focus on the essentials and eliminate unnecessary expenses.
- Track your spending and adjust as needed.
- Start building an emergency fund.
- Take advantage of available veteran resources and benefits.
- Keep the lines of communication open between you and your spouse.
- Set goals, adapt as needed, and ask for help when you need it.
With the right support and a solid plan, couples like Maria and Alex can thrive after military service. They just need to take it one step at a time.
Discussion Questions:
- How can open communication between spouses help manage financial stress during the military-to-civilian transition?
- What are some potential challenges military families might face when adjusting to civilian life, and how can they proactively address these challenges?
- How can veteran-specific resources, such as VA benefits and career assistance programs, play a crucial role in easing the financial burden after military service?
- What strategies can military couples use to stay united while navigating the financial changes and uncertainties after service?
- Why is it important to create a financial plan together as a couple, and what are the key elements to include in that plan for a successful transition?
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